I will always choose the roller coaster over the merry-go-round

So I realize that my last post may have sounded a bit unsettling but that was how I was feeling.  Since my last post I have gotten my car back, my evaluation postponed, and received a lot of support from my faculty head to help our girls succeed on this standards-based assessment.

I recently watched the old movie from 1989 Parenthood remember with Steve Martin.  It was a fantastic trip down memory lane and I thought it hit home a little for me now that I am a parent.  Remember the kid Justin in the movie how he butts things with his head and is just silly? Well that sort of reminds me of Gavin...yeah he is the weird kid at the park, yeah he is the destructive little boy at the Valentine's Day craft party, but I love him and I know he is having a fantastic childhood and that is all that matters right?  And well let's not forget he is a toddler and they are crazy!

The whole reason I bring this up is because towards the end of the movie the Grandma talks about how she used to love riding the roller coaster.  It goes up and down and up and down.  There is an exhilarating feeling and a wonderful feeling and your stomach may get upset and you make get really scared but it  is worth it right?  She goes on to say that some people like the merry-go-round it just goes round and round and you always know what to expect.  She says but I always preferred the roller coaster myself.  Well the scene ends with Steve Martin yelling at his wife, "If she is so wise why is she getting in the neighbors car?"  which of course cracks me up as I wipe away the tears from this philosophical and home-hitting moment on the screen in my living room.  I will always choose the roller coaster over the merry-go-round.  I get so bored and restless when my life becomes too predictable.  So yes I went through a few tough weeks but I have come out the other end with a big smile and even a few lovely experiences to share with my readers.

Last week my friend Sylvia and I went to my first Emirati wedding (Sylvia goes to these every chance she gets; she is an old pro and talked me through the whole experience so I knew all the dos and don'ts). It was in   a huge wedding hall near Jabel Hafeet the mountain here in Al Ain.  The men were located outside dancing and eating in large white tents and the women were all in the wedding hall.  We had a big screen that we could view the men while they were doing a very traditional dance with sticks.  I didn't take any pictures but found some images on the Dubaiheritagewordpress.com website,  to show you what I mean.

The women were located inside a large wedding hall and they were all wearing these gorgeous dresses that some of them were quite  frankly busting out of!  They were all beautiful and it was quite the scene.  There was long red carpet that led to a run-way on stage with this beautiful throne.  On both sides of the running red carpet there were absolutely gorgeous tables set up with beautiful place settings.  There was an array of tabouli, hummus, breads, salads, and dolmas or mashi to snack on.  Lovely ladies dressed in gold came around offering fresh nectars, divine chocolates, decadent bisquits, turkish coffee, tea, perfumes, and even some traditional incense to cleanse you.  I was unable to take pictures but am providing some samples of images that describe what I saw.  

I found some similar dresses to what some of the ladies were wearing on http://www.ecplaza.net

At every social event I have been to they come around with these divine and decadent cannot describe like heaven in your mouth more expensive then gold chocolates!  

So Sylvia and I enjoy the chocolates and watch all the ladies saunter around kissing one another likely commenting on  how beautiful everyone looks.  We choose our favorite dresses and chat for a bit.  Then it is time for the main course.  Each table of 6 to 8 guests of course, naturally, gets their own goat on a platter of rice and chick peas.  Sylvia and I are sitting next to three older Emirati ladies that are wearing Abayas with the traditional burqa style. I found an example of what I mean on http://www.photoburst.net/ 

When the platter is set down I take a little bit of rice on my plate but am already quite full from all the chocolates and biscuits and appetizers.  Well these ladies toss their plates to the side.  The lady grabs the bone from the platter and  begins to vigorously shake it until the marrow splats into the center of the platter. Then all three ladies dive into the platter with their hand shoveling the food under their burqas as fast as they can with cow chewing cud sound affects.  Sylvia and I look at each other and simultaneously put our forks down to indicate we have both lost our appetites...to each culture is to their own right?  Mean while I am carefully ensuring the whole time that I don't do any double dipping-sort of a fruitless gesture at this point lol.  

The beautiful golden ladies come out again to collect our dishes and Sylvia and I are both growing tired as it is a week night.  Some time past 10 o'clock what the whole room has been waiting for happens, the scared and beautiful 17 or 18 year old bride comes down the red carpet.  Her dress is elaborate and white covered in sequence from head to toe, it takes three ladies to keep her dress from collapsing under her feet as she takes each step.  There is a spot light as she walks so carefully towards the stage.  She comes on to the stage and walks to both sides of the stage.  Then she sits on the throne.  We walk over to greet our Emirati collegues as it is now an acceptable time to leave.  Sylvia informs me that sometimes the groom joins the bride and other times he does not.  The ladies are astounded that after attending the wedding we are going to work tomorrow!  Must be nice to take a day off to re-cooperate from a wedding...not us!  No such days off for the westerners.  They tell us that the groom will be coming so we must stay just a few more minutes.  So we sit and watch the ladies scurry to cover up their evening gowns with black Abayas and shaylas.  Then the young groom of 24 comes in to meet his bride.  They are presented to the ladies with no smiles on their faces.  They are both very nice looking.  Sylvia and I take this as an opportunity to follow the crowds out the door.

Then just a few days later all of the English teachers at my school were invited to our vice principal's house to celebrate the birth of her seventh  baby.  So my faculty head, and some of my colleagues join in on a caravan to our vice principal's home just blocks from our school.  As one of the other teachers point out you can immediately see how much money a family has from the gate that you drive through to enter their property.  There are multiple houses on the property.  I am told there is a house for the men to entertain, a house for the women to entertain and then there are the main homes for the family.  We are ushered into the house simply for entertaining female guests.  The front room is an Arabic style room with cathedral ceilings, a couch that wraps around the room.  There is a gorgeous Egyptian style rug on the floor covered with ladies sitting and enjoying an elaborate feast of traditional Arabic dishes.  We are escorted into another beautiful room with the traditional Arabic  style couches and again cathedral ceilings to sit and first have juice, chocolates, and coffee.  It is a little off-putting because it feels a little like segregation the Arabic teachers in one room and the English teachers in another.  But we are informed that Emirati culture is very specific with the tradition order of entertaining guests.  Step one we must have chocolate, nectar, and coffee.  Then the baby is passed around for us to stuff jewelery and money if we so desire.  I quickly passed the baby on because he became fussy.  He was a tiny little thing with a full head of hair.   At this point the baby is taken away and the Arabic teachers say good-bye.  We are then ushered in to the next room to eat.  We had these crepes wrapped around falafel and cream cheese that were amazing, and these little tuna wraps, then of course the goat and rice.  Ending with some cakes and these things that are a lot like donut holes that I have yet to learn the appropriate name for but will continue to refer to them as sticky balls.  So we are on our way.  

Finally last night I got to something I have wanted to do for a long time!  A safari tour!  We went through funtoursdubai.com leaving from the Mall of Emirates I got to enjoy a delicious BBQ Dinner and Folklore Show in a traditional Bedouin Camp.  The safari included Camel Rides, Henna Art, a Show, including traditional Arabic Musicians, Belly Dancers and Egyptian Tanoora Dancers. It was a lot of fun!  The dune bashing was a little more than I could ever handle again they cruise up these dunes super fast and then slide down them with sand cascading off the windows and the jeep is literally free falling. I got a little nauseous in the back seat but I wasn't too scared of rolling the drivers seemed pretty good at their jobs.  What frightened me was how close we were to the other jeeps.  Here are some images I tried to capture as I was bouncing around in the back seat.  

So after I gathered my stomach from the back of the jeep and my hands stopped shaking we moved towards the line for camel rides.  It was really just a photo opp with a short walk in a small circle.  Here I am with  a random stranger whose brother took pictures of us.  They made us ride in pairs so I had to find a buddy because Keith and Heather were riding together.  

Then we moved on to ride the quads.  This was about 30 Usds for 15 minutes so I opted out.  Then the guy running the thing felt sorry for me and made me sit and get my photo on one of the quads.  Then I got on the back with my friend Heather and she took me for a cruise. It was a lot of fun but I know I am old because I was really nervous about tipping over!  

After our ride around the track a few times on the quads we headed down to the main festivities where two lines had formed; one for female and one for male to get food.  We got our plate of food and sat down to watch the entertainment.  There were some tourists that plopped down from a country somewhere near Poland and Russia that is slipping my mind right now.  They spoke no English but introduced themselves and shared their remy martin cognac with us which warmed my mouth, throat, and belly!

Then Heather and I were off to get Henna done.  This is the first time I have gotten Henna done.  The young girl was from India and she did a beautiful job so quickly, I was impressed!

We finished the evening in the Shisha tents where I smoked Shisha for the first time, just to say I have done it.  I tried apple and grape, I preferred the grape as the apple seemed a little more potent.  Then we were off to the buses to head back to the mall of Emirates.  I sat next to a young lady from somewhere in the UK that has just taken a job as a teacher (I had a good laugh because she said she is just looking for a low stress job that pays well) and lives in Al Ain.

So my life in the UAE remains a roller coaster of times when I am missing home and consistency and things that make sense to me to times where I feel like I am on a lovely ride that I would have been crazy to have ever passed up.  I am again thankful for this opportunity and grateful for my experiences thus so far on my journey in the middle east.  

Superwoman...

I have to be honest at times living overseas becomes a bit too much and I have moments of weakness where all I think about is hopping on the next plane home.  I do not thing that is uncommon for most of us here.  All changes leave us conflicting as we grow older and make significant life changes.  When I went off to college and moved only an hour and a half's drive from my hometown I remember having these moments.  The first  time I crashed my car away from home or got the flu my first instinct was to think, "I need my mommy."  I remember this sinking feeling of being in something unfamiliar and wishing so much that my mom was there.

Then I graduated from college and did something obscene!  I drove 24 hours and planted my roots in New Mexico all the way from Iowa.  New Mexico was so different!  I went through a whole new kind of shock.  There was stop and go traffic, drunk bums in my yard on Christmas, crack heads asking me for money in the grocery store, and people were even speaking Spanish all around me.  I adapted and I even made a life for myself in New Mexico at times thinking I wanted to scurry home to the familiar and it all seemed to work out.

Well in hindsight with both instances the times that I felt like I needed my mom or wanted to run home with my tail between my legs are when my job became too stressful, or it seemed like my health was poor and my car had problems or I got in a car accident or had a bad break-up from a boyfriend.  All the usual need your mommy kind of things, right?

Now I am 33 years old and I have to say it is not so much my mommy I feel like I need these days.  I  do miss my mom don't get me wrong but what I am realizing is that I miss the comfort in understanding how things work at home.  The consistency of living in the same country for 32 years of my life and knowing what to expect in certain social situations, emergency situations, and even professional situations.  These moments of certainty are fleeting living in a completely different country and when I have these moments of heartache, failure, frustration that come with living I feel at odds with this fleeting feeling of unfamiliarity and my instinct is to jump on a plane and fly home;  I won't act on this because my mom taught me not to quit so I won't quit and my practical side makes a mental list of pros and cons of my new life here all the time and in the long run the pros out weigh the cons and I know that this is a great experience across the board.

Let me take a moment to evaluate why I am feeling so at odds with my soul in a sense.  The end of February I was blessed with the sandbox sinus infection which left me feeling wiped out paired with my thyroid levels being a little off which equated to scrapping my diet and becoming super exhausted all the time stuffing my face with as much chocolate and cheese as I could grab.  So I imagine this didn't help me in the long run.  I was frustrated because I wasn't getting better and spent two weekends in a row lying in bed trying to get better so I could work during the week.  Due to the lengthy process of getting sick days off I feel like it is just easier to go to work sick then to deal with going to the emergency room and then going to get your sick note stamped and now the expectation that this is all entered into the computer or your wages are docked which is just too confusing for my head to get around when I am sick.

Well then the 100 days of school was coming upon us and we decided that we wanted to throw a huge educational fair with games revolved around the theme of 100.  It was really fantastic and our girls really enjoyed it and we really impressed our Arabic staff with the quality of organization that we put into it.  It was well worth the effort but it was time consuming!  We spent days after school staying until 4 or 5 o'clock arguing over details, organizing, and setting up for this thing.  The day finally came last week and we were all wiped!

Here was my corner, the art corner (never again so exhausting after 300 girls!)

Here are some of the girls working in my corner

Here are a few other corners we had.  There was also a relay race and a race to 100...

Here is a picture of me and one of my classes...they all have on necklaces we made that week and crowns!

So while all of this is going on I am not saving any energy for my husband and son when I get home.  I am exhausted and cannot seem to shake this evil sinus infection.  We are eating fast food almost every night (which I think may be the leading cause to depression lol).  We have stopped our evening walks around the complex or to the park.  I have stopped cooking and playing with play-doh with Gavin every night.  We aren't lying in bed reading Sandra Boyton books and things seem to be taking an ugly turn for me.

Then my car dies on the way to school on one of the busiest round abouts in the city.  I stand there waiting for the tow truck to come (thankfully I knew I had road side assistance with my insurance company).  A police officer comes along and he speaks little to know English.  I stand there with him trying not to burst into tears while I wait for the tow truck driver.  He asks me, "Car no run?"  I shake my head telling him it won't run and assuring him that the tow truck driver is on his way and isn't far.  He walks away and makes some calls and comes back asking again trying to make sure he states it very clear, "Car-no-run?"  This scenario repeat itself again and again as time drags to a stop and we wait for the alleged tow truck driver to get here.  Finally after he asks me,"Car no run," for the millionth time I proceed to rein-act the sounds my car made as it died.  Then I  demonstrate for him the sound of an engine attempting to turn over with no success.  He seems pleased with my performance and thankfully does not ask me again, "car no run?"

Now the tow truck driver comes and of course he speaks no English and apparently the insurance company gave  him no information on where I would like the car delivered (why would they?).  So after I find a million different ways to explain that the car needs to go to Dubai to the dealership and I plan to grab a taxi and do I have to pay for the extra kilometers?  Mafi Inglisi...no English...I try calling my faculty head who speaks Arabic, the policemen calls his friend who speaks broken English and then I do what of done to begin with and call the insurance company to translate.  After a few phone calls and another half an hour I am in a taxi on the way to school.

What is wrong with my car?   My brand new used car?  Well it was the radiator and then apparently due to my negligence it became a cracked head gasket.  However only the day before had I noticed the cars gauge was reading hot when the air conditioning was running (not when it was off!).  So I took the car to get the oil changed at the Adnoc lube.  All fluids were checked and topped off and I was told coolant levels were fine!  I was also shown my black sludge oil which indicated to me that the oil was not changed before the car was sold to me...go figure?!  So now I have been with out my car for going on two weeks now and have had to rent a car and am still not sure if my warranty will cover this and honestly (although now I am being told they will do everything they can to try and get this covered under the warranty).   I am trying to tell myself my car will be ready when it is ready and if I have to pay out of pocket then that is what credit cards are for, right?  It will all work out right?  But you can see  how it sort of feels like things are piling up and I might want to hop on a plane these days?  I will reiterate now it becomes a positive affirmation, I can do this, I can work through this, life only gives us what we can handle right?

Now the 100 days of school party is over and my car is being worked on so breath right?  Wrong now my faculty head comes in with a copy of an observation she did when I was sick and had given an assessment; not actually delivering a lesson.   Until now she has showered me with positive feedback.  Not today!  On this day she piles it on, three paragraphs summarizing my failures at this particular juncture.  I haven't provided my students with an objective for the assessment (a multiplication chart isn't that self explanatory?).  I haven't provided clear expectations for what the students should do when they complete the assessment (I try to encourage them to free read but  they just weren't listening).  Finally, I do not have enough time on task and I need to ensure I am consistently implementing my behavior stop light. I can give you a list of justifications for all of these things but the reality was it was just a bad  day, I was sick, and I wasn't prepared for an observation and we all have bad days.  It just kind of hits me in the gut because I am already asking myself am I good teacher (Do not see Waiting for Superman because ever since I keep asking myself if I am a charismatic enough teacher;  I mean I didn't teach my kids the times table with a song did I?)?

Then we find out that grade 3 has a standards bases assessment coming up in March and we get a copy of the test to begin preparing our students for.  The test we are told will make up 20 % of their grades!  Are you kidding me?  A child can actually be held back in the third grade due to their performance on a standards based test.  I pour myself over these tests really beating myself up and wondering again teaching....am I good at it or do I do this profession justice or is this my calling?  Math is predominately word problems rather then calculations.  The science is  written in very scientific language.  The English test is pretty easy and I know I have prepared them for this.  But I feel like a big jerk hindering my girls because I decided to modify science and instead of using a  word like dissolve I have said, "goes away," or instead of observe I have said, "look" because in my heart  I think like a special education teacher.  I want them to get the concept and I want them to feel successful.  Have I hindered my girls because we don't drill vocabulary in science or even math.  In math my girls do not know things like, "how many all together" or "sum of" or "number placement (they can tell you what place the one is in but will be very confused with the terminology on the exam."   So again I feel like a failure!  So more cheese and chocolate and now I make a trip to Spinney's Liquor because Mrs. Leah grade 3 teacher needs some wine in her house again.

Don't get me wrong I have managed to create a very strong support system here and after collapsing in tears my good friend Sylvia from South Africa took me to starbucks and turned my tears into giggles.   My friend Carrie from my school reminded me how we all struggle with these same fleeting thoughts.  We come over here to the UAE to teach, with high hopes of turning these girls into grade level standard performers and instead they can carry on a very simple conversation in English and they are beginning to read and maybe even tell you why they like a book.  These moments when a girl comes to me and says in very broken English what she predicts will happen in a book and how she smiles when she is right and then when she tells me why she likes the book I know I am doing something.  I am teaching my girls to love literature in a country where the average citizen reads two pages of literature a year (according to The National).  Unfortunately these are not the results that my employer wants.  They want more and that can feel defeating at times.

Now add to this now prevailing feeling of failure and apparent spring fever in my girls which means they are as Sylvia  might say, "out of their trees," or even, "all over the show."  I am finding it really hard to handle them lately and am very concerned with my upcoming observation because the principal expects their behavior to be perfect when she observes.  Spring break is just two weeks away and I can see it over the horizon but unfortunately that means mapping booklets must once again be completed.  Which means for me 46 booklets, one for each girl, with 14 pages of standards to high light and decipher whether I believe they have completed such feats as "uses descriptive and/or  figurative language to support a point of view," or "model and describe equal groups of arrays and find their totals," or "Group materials according to whether they are solids, liquids, or gases," and did I mention this is all written in size 8 font.  Then once these are finished (only takes about 45 minutes per girl...that is all) then we get to enter the same information in a different format into the computer (which can be minimized to about 20 minutes per girl).  All of this while in the back of my mind we have to make sure our classroom will meet our employers standards because we  are expecting a visit from a group of cluster managers and administrators to evaluate our school and spend two days at our school looking through our assessment binders, our mapping booklets, lesson plans, and curriculum maps.  So no stress right?

So if you ask me at this moment if I love my job, love this experience, am I happy I might not want to answer because honestly I feel like this kind of pressure is what can lead to nervous breakdowns.  I am trying to chill out relax and not take everything so serious and trying to have the attitude that I can do this and it will make me a better teacher and all of that.  And when my girls bring me flowers and tell me they love me and draw me pictures and grin from ear to ear from an activity we are doing in the classroom it all feels right.  A night at the movies giggling with my husband about some of things that make me laugh so much in this country.  I need that.  Writing a blog and putting it all out there, maybe therapeutic.  Maybe I simply need some validity that I am strong and I am prevailing over some pretty challenging  weeks past and coming.  I need a reminder sometimes that teachers, we really are superwomen (and men) all around the globe and isn't about the summers off.

I want to end this blog on a little more positive note.  I am going to get through the next two weeks and I am going to come out on the other end feeling empowered and after spring break I will be refreshed and ready to get through the last trimester successful and I will come back next year knowing so much more and I just know things will be running a bit smoother with this reform and my job will get easier and I will start to know what to expect on some level and I know things will get easier.  After all I get to hop on a plane in just two weeks and go to Greece and see a good friend from college.

Michael has started taking classes online and they are going well and I am really proud of him.  Gavin is going to start nursery school soon which will be really good for everyone and he can socialize with other two year olds and three year olds which will be good for him too.

My thoughts on culture shock...

Culture Shock is defined by http://dictionary.reference.com/  as,

"a state of bewilderment and distress experienced by an individual who is suddenly exposed to a new, strange, or foreign social and cultural environment ."

Culture shock can be defined in five stages and not everyone goes through them.

The 5 stages of culture shock:
    * The Honeymoon

    * The Actual Shock/Negotiation

    * The Adjustment

    * Assimilation

    * Reverse Cultural Shock

Before I came to the United Arab Emirates.  I read everything I could about culture shock and these five stages came up pretty frequently in my research.  These five stages are very general and often fail to consider that people will experience different phases in different cultures.  The United Arab Emirates is completely different in terms of what someone might experience because the country is made up of so many expatriates (you can almost avoid the culture all together if you work in an office of other expatriates).  If someone is from India and comes to the UAE they may feel some of these stages but they may also just surround themselves with other Indian expatriates.  Someone from Australia may feel these stages as well but never quite assimilate because they too find other Australians and continue to live very similar lives to what they lived in Australia.  And me?  I am from America and for the most part who do I spend my time with?  Other Americans?  But as an educator I come into contact with Emirates and Arab Expatriates everyday these are my colleagues and my students so the shock was inevitable. 

So in my research I read that in the UAE there are two types of the stage of "adjustment" in the UAE.  In one type we surround ourselves with expatriates from our home country or western countries and live very familiar lives from back home down to the cinema, the food, and even our extracurricular activities.  We often join in on complaint sessions in regards to the Emirates and Arabic culture.  On the other end of the spectrum there is this world where expatriates become friends with Emirates and Arab expatriates and learn about their culture.  They experience the food and may attend an Emirate wedding or celebration.  They see the beauty of the Muslim community and they find some acceptance.  This acceptance brings them to a place where they really see the UAE as their home rather than temporary situation in their lives.  In my research I remember reading that if one did not come to this place of acceptance that they might as well have a calendar on their wall counting down the days until they get home.  They forgot to mention the fuzzy gray area in between the two places that I seem to have landed.  So finding myself in limbo of acceptance and rejection I want to really dissect my culture shock according to the five stages of culture shock.  First I will give the definition of each stage and then I will attempt to summarize what my feelings were during this stage. 

According to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Culture_shock the Honeymoon Phase is defined as the following:

During this period the differences between the old and new culture are seen in a romantic light, wonderful and new. For example, in moving to a new country, an individual might love the new foods, the pace of the life, the people's habits, the buildings and so on. During the first few weeks most people are fascinated by the new culture. They associate with the nationals that speak their language and are polite to the foreigners. This period is full of observations and new discoveries. Like many honeymoons this stage eventually ends.

When I first arrived in Abu Dhabi we were greeted with roses and brought to the 5 star hotel the Rotana Beach with view of the gulf out our window.  Honeymoon?  Yes!  I felt like I was in a fantasy land with enormous sky scrapers everywhere.  I was snapping a million pictures of the beautiful buildings, the hotel, I even went stark mad just taking photos of trays of food in the breakfast buffet.  I was trying new foods and even ate the McArabia from McDonalds just because it was different!  I look at this stage and fear that maybe my honeymoon phase was short changed by the wear and tear that hotel life started to have on us. 

According to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Culture_shock the Negotiation Phase is defined as the following:

After some time (usually three months but sometimes sooner or later, depending on the individual), differences between the old and new culture become apparent and may create anxiety. Excitement may eventually give way to new and unpleasant feelings of frustration and anger as one continues to have unfavorable events that may be perceived as strange and offensive of one's cultural sensitivity. Language barrier, stark differences in public hygiene, traffic safety, food accessibility and quality may heighten the sense of disconnection from the surroundings.

For us I think the "Negotiation Phase," came sooner due to hotel life becoming so draining!  I kept finding myself saying again and again that once we get into our homes everything will be easier!  I won't fight with my husband and my son won't make me insane if we can just get in our home with an internet connection and a stove and a fridge.  I was starting to feel like my hierarchy of needs were not being met.  Many would laugh at me and I feel ashamed to say that when so many people could and would never consider living in a 5 star hotel challenging; but it was!  We were ready for our apartment and space!


We were running out of money and getting really sick of eating out, not having internet, and not having space for our very active two year old son to rome about (his legs were covered in bruises from running into the furniture in the small hotel room) or even a space for him to nap or fall asleep before we did.  In addition to that is the anxiety that comes with this country deriving from questions like:  when will have a meeting? When do we move to our apartments? When do we move from Abu Dhabi to Al Ain?  When do we get our passports back?  When do we find out school placements, get debit cards, get rental cars, when do we start school and how will I find my school?  For a type A personality that likes a lot of control it can feel like the honeymoon phase comes to a crashing stop.  I still felt myself saying and still do over and over again am I really here?  Am I really living in this fast growing country across the world from all that I know with camels in the back of Toyotas?  And I smile because it is something that will continue to amaze me and justify this decision. 



According to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Culture_shock the Adjustment Phase is defined as the following:

Again, after some time (usually 6 – 12 months), one grows accustomed to the new culture and develops routines. One knows what to expect in most situations and the host country no longer feels all that new. One becomes concerned with basic living again, and things become more "normal". One starts to develop problem-solving skills for dealing with the culture, and begins to accept the culture ways with a positive attitude. The culture begins to make sense, and negative reactions and responses to the culture are reduced.

So I know on some levels I am here in this phase right now.  I am used to the new culture, I am never surprised and often anticipate many things that were shocking at first.  Food delivered may take two hours and  that is ok even if they said 45 minutes (complaining does you know good).  I may have to return to the electric company four or five times to get the utilities switched in my name and they may be completely inefficient but it doesn't surprise me.  Cars may fly up on two wheels around the round about and I may feel like I am on the defense often when driving; but I am not phased by this lack for safety in this country.  I may pick up son up at a day care stuffing his face with cotton candy delivered to him by a stranger and I won't even raise an eyebrow.  The prayer calls have become background noise and I know to go shopping on Fridays around noon to have the malls to ourselves and the other western expatriates.  I know that most places are closed from 2 to 4 and on Fridays so I don't even bother trying to get things done then.  I know that "No problem" does not always mean there won't be a problem.  I know that sometimes Insha Allah means it will happen and sometimes it won't.  I learned the world won't end if my son pulls his pants down in the mall or I wear a short sleeve shirt or accidentally eat with my left hand or cross my legs in public.  So in so many ways I feel right at home here. 

I have also found my favorite places to shop, get dinner, joined a bowling league, go to movies, have a reliable babysitter, my favorite route to work, and have made some good friends.  We have favorite parks and Mike, Gavin and I love to go to Dubai just to go to the book store and eat at big American chains like Outback and Fridays.  We love to go to explore Al Ain and love that there is so much to do that revolves around family.  We are happy here.  We miss family and can't wait to see them this summer and look forward to a time when we return to the United States but are not by any means checking dates off a calendar. 

As I read the last portion of the this phase of culture shock as defined by Wikopedia it states, "The culture begins to make sense, and negative reactions and responses to the culture are reduced."

Some may say I am extremely self-absorbed in my own cultural ways or too confident or cocky even, to say that the way we do things in the United States is best.  Maybe?  But I will never be able to make sense of the way things are done here!  I will never be able to understand (I can deal with it and let it roll of my shoulders) why the bazillion stamps and why there isn't a universal computer server for each company.  For example if I want something done with my bank I have to go to a certain branch and no one can just pull something up from a connected server on the computer (this means lots of driving around).  Lack of efficiency across the board at the government level and the business level and I can never find any sense in something that I see so inefficient, I just can't!  I really believe that there are some Emirates that are paid some outlandish salary just to sit in an office and stamp things.  I will continue to have negative reactions to these things and opposition to the backwards and inefficient planning for so many things in this country.  So does this mean that I will not find acceptance?

I suppose on some levels my reactions have reduced to a shrug of the shoulder and a certain expectation for this inefficiency so that I blink my eyes and more or less forget that  I had to give five copies of my passport to someone for some reason and they still need another copy because they can't find it.  I know I can't let these things eat me up but do I have to make sense of it?  In my professional opinion no!  I can let it go but I cannot endorse inefficiency.  In contrast anyway I could make a list a mile long of the inefficiencies in the United States so I suppose in some ways I have not quite found acceptance even in my own country...

According to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Culture_shock the Mastery Phase is defined as the following:

In the mastery stage assignees are able to participate fully and comfortably in the host culture. Mastery does not mean total conversion; people often keep many traits from their earlier culture, such as accents and languages. It is often referred to as the biculturalism stage.

Mastery is still over the horizon for me.  I am still learning so much and this learning could go on for a while.  For example it was just brought to my attention that drinking coffee at the morning assembly isn't culturally appropriate and apparently I have been getting looks of disgust for months now.  I feel terrible now and I do not bring my coffee to morning assembly and I felt pretty bad that I made such a terrible mistake ongoing for so long with out thinking twice.  Culturally for me teacher + morning = coffee mug in her hand.  I never considered the notion that no one else was drinking coffee.  I have to say my mornings are a little off now but I am working on it.  I suppose mastery will be when I avoid making these little mistakes all together for the most part.  Insha Allah...

Spontinuity and Impulses

So last week I traded in my rental yaris tin can for a lovely new Mitsubishi, Outlander, a crossover 4x4.  It is used and for just a little more then a rental I will have it paid off in two years and it is still under warranty.  It couldn't be more of a boring color, white, but as my friend Abby points out it is pearly white.  I really love driving it and can tell already that I am getting more respect on the road from my fellow drivers and maybe my head is a little taller to not be driving the same vehicle as the Farooj Chicken delivery guy.  But I have to complain, there is a tape player!  No CD player and how did I miss that, well I am super impulsive and didn't look for details like a CD players or MP3 player compatibility...the worst part is that all in the same week the one station in Al Ain that plays American music, which is pretty bad top 20 stuff suddenly stopped playing American music and switched to Hindi.  Fantastic!  So I am currently improvising with my phone or netbook for music or I sing to myself.  I plan on doing a little shopping for a CD player for my car at some junction; but not on the agenda this month. Here is a picture and in case you are wondering I am not leaving the plastic on the seats like some of the strange locals (apparently this is big here to keep things in their packaging to keep them nice; not uncommon to see all the stickers on the computer of a teller or customer service rep.

In other news I joined a bowling league.  Yes there is bowling with out alcohol and I suck at it!  I joined with some other teachers and so far we are having a lot of fun.  It seems to be all teachers for the most part and no one seems super competitive although it is clear we all want to win!  We get to just unwind and be super silly and laugh a lot and it is nice to get away from Mike and Gavin and have some guaranteed girl time once a week.  Also bonus, it counts as activity points on weight watchers! Here is a picture of my team, "split happens,"

From right to left there is Jolynn from Illinois, Sylvia from South Africa, and of course me, and Abby from Illinois (I met her in Iowa before we came out here).

We have a lot of laughs and I am really enjoying  bowling so far!

This past weekend was really fun and full.  On Friday, my friend Abby and I got much needed pedicures, which we agreed we needed much more frequently.  Then we were off to the Al Ain Airshow.  I haven't been to an airshow since I was a kid, it was pretty amazing!  Gavin was all over the place running around and had gasps of enthusiasm for the planes and loud booms and had his fill on junk food.  We went with Abby and her family and really enjoyed it.  Here is a picture of Mike and Gavin enjoying the airshow (yes we try to keep Gavin strapped in as much as possible!)

Then afterwards we decided to throw caution into the wind or be sponteaneous and we hopped into our rugged new 4x4s packed with hot dogs, wood, a grill, some chairs, and sand toys and found us some random dunes.  We are in the desert so why not?  So we drove abound 8 miles towards Dubai and pulled off into the nearest deserty sand dunes stocked with some camels nearby and everything.  Abby's truck got stuck in the desert!  Mike and Andy had to jump on the back of the truck and jump up and down and do some pushing to get it out.  Apparently they weren't working the 4x4 correctly but I had to make the joke and ask if they were still planning to join the off roaders club when they got stuck in the sand making a three point turn about.

We set up near a few dunes and the boys started digging with their toys and the sun began to set quickly!  We got the grill and fire going and made some hotdogs and smores.  It was a lot of fun!  The only downside was that Gavin is really impulsive/active/unaware of the whole toppling down a dune to be injured concept so after trying to corner him in a cornerless desert to play in one area, we were forced to strap him to his stroller and supply him with enough chips, graham crackers, and marshmallows to keep him from whining.

Here is a fantastic picture my friend Abby took of me, Gavin, her boys, and Michael at the top of a dune at sunset. 

Here is another picture of Abby and I making smores around the little grill Abby brought.

Then on Saturday I was invited to a Valentine's Day craft party at another teacher's flat.  She had put together a whole morning of activities for the kids to make crafts including picture frames, necklaces, and valentines.  I really thought it was a good idea for Gavin!  I really did!  Gavin has limited activity with other kids and I really thought this would be a great opportunity for him to get to play with other kids!  I also have spent time coloring and working with play-doh with him and as long as I am there to guide him he loves it and can spend quite a bit of time focused diligently on the task at hand.  Plus I just figured in his love for hearts was a plus, I mean how could we go wrong?

Well we arrived and everything started off so sweet and innocent!  Gavin was nicely gluing hearts together creating a lovely valentine for Daddy or Mommy.  He even was coloring on it very nicely.  Then he notices the necklace making station with beads.  Hearts, and starts! Oh my!  He loves hearts and stars (he seems to have a thing for shapes lately-really really into them).  I grab a nice handfull and bring him back to our area where I try to focus him on making a neckclace with the beads I have.  Before I can stop him he dives towards the nicely organised dishes of beads and he dumps them over.  OH no he doesn't stop there!  He then preoceeds to wave his hands back and forth to see them fly accross the room.  At this point my sweet hostess is grabbing the broom and scrambling to pick them up and assuring me that isn't a big deal and I am sure at this point it isn't, everyone is laughing and Gavin is really confused when I put him in time out.  I apollogize profusely and then decide he needs a distraction.  Gavin is compulsive, I am going with," it is a normal two year old thing." 

For example if he sees a toy at the park and wants to play with it and the child that has it refuses then we have to leave the park because he will think of nothing else but getting his hands on the toy.  At times distraction will work but mostly it doesn't and why didn't my gut realize that the beads fell under this very same category?  Here I am with a group of ladies that I barely know hoping to have some new friendships for both Gavin and I to flourish trying desperately to get Gavin to eat a cookie and get his mind off of things.  And he dives again into the beads!  Desperately trying to ensure every bead is spread across the room.  Again my hostess smiles as she scrambles to pick up all the beads and my heartrate goes up and I feel panicky and Gavin sees the other kids going to play and he follows.  Maybe he is distracted now? I saunter down the hall to see how Gavin is playing when oldest boy begins to point frantically at the cookie on the floor, "who brought food in the bedroom?  There is no food allowed in the bedroom!  Who brought food in the bedroom?"  I apollogized to the young boy and scurried to hide the evidence hoping no one would see my child with the red scarlet cookie.  Well at this point Gavin decides to give the beads one more toss around the room and our sweet hostess has given up on cleaning up the beads plopping defeated on the couch.  Gavin is now attempting to dislodge the door from the princess doll house of the little girl and I can see I need to leave.  They all smile and nod and say good-bye and I even imagine are feeling a little sense of relief.  I left and in hindsight realize Gavin just might not be ready for craft day.

Here are the beads before Gavin attacked them lol:

Here is Gavin's valentine before he turned into baby godzilla:

Next week Michael and I are headed back to Abu Dhabi for the first time since we were bussed away from the Beach Rotana last August.  We are going to Yas Island to see Eric Clapton!  I cannot wait!  Details to come on that venture!  I am up way past my bedtime but I have to admit it is kind of nice.  Michael is in Dubai with a friend and for the first time in a long time I have the place to myself while Gavin sleeps; the peace is kind of nice. 

So a friend posted a link to this blog that another teacher has written and I think it really captures all the negatives of my experience thus so far.  I also think it would be a good blog for anyone considering this experience to read.

Here is a link:
http://mellyschu.blogspot.com/2010/11/truth-is.html

This is pretty intense and I can see all of what she is writing about.  I think in a way I am pretty lucky at my school, while there is a division and probably some teachers that look down their noses at me (not probably there is!).  I choose to only notice the happy bubbly Egyptian music teacher that always smiles at me (and makes less money then us).  She is a larger woman with glasses and a very colorful and elaborate kandora and head scarf, and she wears a thick pancho over her clothes in the cool weather.  Every morning she gets the girls together to play music for the assembly and she works so hard and because she is Egyptian her salary is less then us (salary for expats is generally a significant amount more than one would earn in their home country but not equal to other teachers at the school...westerners all make the same based on experience and then Emirates naturally make significantly more).  Well she greets all of the LTs every morning with eye contact, smiles and firm handshakes.  She asks about family and really cares.  One morning my friend Sylvia from South Africa was shivering a bit and coughing and she took her warm pancho off and gave it to her!  This is just an example of some of the humanity in this country that does exist.  Another teacher works in Special Education (I still have no idea what she does but she has a child with special needs of her own and openly admits it and this is humbling for someone from this country).  She has lost a child from illness and I imagine that has been humbling as well for her.  She is an Emirate woman and due to her child's illness she lived in the states a few years so she has more acceptance and appreciation for western society.  She lights up when she sees me.  When I was out sick with kidney stones she was scribbling down homeopathic remedies for me and had legitimate concern for my health.  So there are some open minded opened arm teachers at my school; however they are in the minority and many of the ladies shake your hand if you come up to them and they look somewhere else and they force fake smiles, and I try to attribute it to the language barrier (hey I got to sleep at night!).

The principal to me is a quiet woman that stands at morning assembly and never addresses the student body.  She is thin and frail and wears a very simple black abaya and shayla.  She doesn't say a lot and is always very quiet and smiles when she sees us. From what I can tell she appreciates and wants us at her school and understands how hard we work)  It seems the assistant principal is the real authority and I do get a bit of disgust from her and lack of appreciation for what we do (for example she wanted us to complete our marks over Christmas vacation with no value for our time off).  For the most part I know that there is a division at our school and there is a level of disrespect to the point that some of us feel like servants at our school but I just choose not to see it that way.  I come to school just as I always did in the US and I teach.  I close the doors and I close out the drama that exhists at every school (which comes with the territory of working in a female dominated profession, too much estrogen makes me choke).  I dot my i's and cross my t's and I stay under the radar as much as possible.  My principal has stepped foot in my classroom twice and both times she smiled.  I also have a few random Arabic teachers that stroll in to yell at the girls, pass out notes, take my girls away or whatever and I go with the flow.  But honestly I can do this and I feel like what I am taking from it is that I am becoming a better teacher for it.  I am seeing some progress with my girls and in the grand scheme of things that is what matters. 

We took our girls on a picnic at the park.  I brought a jump rope and they loved it!  Great picture of girls jumping rope.

Many of the girls just as their culture teaches them, tossed their trash on the ground.  Well, the Arabic teachers were happy with that and I guess thought that the laborers could clean it.  But the LTs brought trash bags!  And all the grade three girls new the words to the Barney "Clean up" song.  The Arabic teachers jaws were to the floor as our girls happily sang the clean up song scurrying around picking up garbage and sorting out any food that was untouched to give to laborers at the park or the cleaners at the school (these ladies are from Ethiopia and the Phillipenes and make roughly 200 USD a month that they send home so they eat very poorly).  It was fantastic!  When one of the LTs said to the Arabic staff, "we don't want the park to spread around how filthy our school is," they agreed to this disgusting task as they certainly were not going to pitch in!

This is not a Muslim or Arabic thing, this is just what money does to these people.  Why walk or find a trash can if someone else can pick it up?  It is not uncommon to see trash flying from a car, or to see a family cleaning the trash from their car on the ground of a parking lot.   We were also amazed that the Arabic staff just left their picnicking materials on the path thinking someone would pick it up and of course we did (sure that makes us look less like their inferiors right?),

Ok so this blog I mentioned earlier in my post got me thinking because the real cure to culture shock is acceptance and appreciation of the culture but I know for me that will never really happen, I will leave here repelled by Arabic culture (ok not all Arabic culture but for the most part any Arabics with lots of money) and the opposite is happening to me.  For example when I see Arabic kids at the playground I grab Gavin and go away because I know they will be throwing sand, taking his toys, or just plain push him away because he is an annoying two year old (they will come up to me and tell me to make him stop trying to play with them...so sad).  Instead of keeping an open mind I find myself thinking or expecting these kids to be rude brats. Let me exemplify, last night we were in Dubai at the Chucky Cheese and Gavin was playing with one of the employees and he got away and was on the run so she was chasing him and I was right behind her chasing him too.  Well he saw an Arabic boy , maybe ten or eleven playing dance revolution and jumped on the game too!  He started playing with the kid.  I caught up to Gavin and grabbed him and the Arabic kid is screaming bloody hell at this employee.  His mother and father are at the table near by taking the whole scene in and they are not intervening.  He wants a refund because this little boy ruined his game.  I was holding Gavin in my arms watching this and I said, "stop yelling at her!"  I handed him my game card, "I will pay for another game, my god he is two years old."  He glared at me and stomped over to his table and grabbed his card and paid for the game.  The employee rolled her eyes at me and smiled.

I am trying to find the beauty in the Arabic and  Muslim cultures but not sure I can really find the needed appreciation and acceptance to really allow myself to settle here for even a moment.  I guess on some levels my culture shock is becoming less and less as I learn my favorite places to shop, my routes to and from school, make friends and I am even joining a bowling league and buying a car so in a sense we are making a life here but I know it will always be us and them and that I will leave her never really taking on the original acceptance and appreciation I intended to have or gain when I leave this country. 

I think about what made me want to pick up my roots and run away from New Mexico and it was mainly poverty.  Because of poverty the social problems that existed made Albuquerque a not so enticing location to raise a child.  High rates in alcoholism, drinking and driving, drugs, gang activity, garbage in the parks and streets, lack of parental involvement with children (which translates to poor academic performance, more violence and bullying on the playground), and too much crime.  Our neighbors were shooting shot guns on the holidays into the ground, our neighbors would not think twice before stealing packages from our step or letting their dogs crap in our yard.  You get it, no sense of community, the parks were not safe, and the schools were not safe.  I didn't want my son to grow up and be hazed for a gang...you get it right?  I couldn't leave soon enough after four men walked into the Denny's down the street with machine guns leaving the 16 year old waitress dead. 

So in contrast what disgusts me here is the money (which breeds poverty that lives in fear so it doesn't translate to crime).  I appreciate the family values and the safety that the stringent laws creates.  But so much faith in their god seems to translate to lack of safety.  They feel like God wills them to be safe.  So no carseats, stuff 100 kids on a bus made for 60 kids, drive like maniacs and if a child dies it was their God's will and there was nothing they could do to change that.  Then the life of priviledge and having a servant to do everything means complete lack of humanity for some of these laborers.  They always have someone to carry things for them or clean things for them.  I could go on and on when I think about lack of humanity in some of these people and lack of work ethic.  It seems like too there is also a lack of parent involvement because these women just shoot out babies (the more babies the cooler you are) and so they don't have time to give their children the attention they need and often the nannies take care of them.  So this translates to no discipline, bullying, violence, and poor academic performance.  Hmmmm interesting how similar poverty and money can translate to the same thing...

I guess what I am saying is that suburban and middle class America has never looked so good to me.

As my two week holiday came to an end and I came back to school with my new years resolutions to eat healthier, be a better mom (in other words time for potty training and getting the kid off the sippy), and to be more active.  What am I doing to make these changes? 

I started by joining Weight Watchers online on January 1st which has put me in a position to really track my food intake.  I am more aware of my portion sizes and how to make healthy substitutions.  I am trying to be active in some way at least 20 minutes a day and trying to vary it up with Pilate's, yoga, walking, and the weights and treadmill we purchased over the holidays.  I have also added multi-vitamins to my life and am eating more fruits and vegetables which also means Gavin is slowly becoming more interested in eating healthy.  So far while the pounds are not flying off I am feeling more energetic and more comfortable in my clothes.  This also translates to being a better teacher because I am sitting down a lot less which means I am a more vigil and active teacher.

How am I becoming a better teacher so far??  I am trying to reflect on student performance and group my students accordingly.  I have organized my girls into reading groups and am attempting to differentiate instruction giving the girls different leveled readers and activities and surprisingly there are not too many complaints that they are doing different activities.  On a side note why this surprises me is because this culture squashes individuality on some levels and often I see so many girls attempting to be just like the other girls and this can be related to the fact that the mothers and fathers are so much the same in attire and even mannerisms and walking...I mean to say most of the Arabic ladies walk the same; they sort of slowly float along and the men do as well.  Which in contrast is funny because in their cars they drive like maniacs.  Anyways so my whole point was that because I see my girls so desperately needing to be the same as the group I thought they would throw a tiffy when I started to give them different activities but I found that as long as they are in cooperative learning groups and the girl next to them is doing the same thing they are fine.  Now in each class I have one girl that is even beyond the highest reading group.  I have given these girls even high readers and activities to choose from.

While I have been able to differentiate in reading I am still really struggling with this in math and the reality is I need to.  For example the past two weeks I have been struggling to teach carrying and borrowing in addition and subtraction.  I have used hundred charts, and base ten blocks and still I have some girls that are just clueless and some girls that are ready to move on.  So I know that a good teacher could find a way to get the higher girls to move on and would find a way to go back over the skill with the girls that still are not getting it.  But I just don't know how to do this because very few of my girls are independent learners.  I can give them a task and they need constant recognition so when trying to work with the low girls the high girls are right there to show me their work and look for recognition.  So this is something I know I need to improve on.

My faculty head says to me after an observation that I struggle with my "time on task," and I have to agree with her.  I have trouble getting my girls focused and they easily get distracted.  This derives from poor classroom management.  Now I know I don't have the worst classroom management but I know for sure it could be better.  Now in contrast there are teachers that are excellent at classroom management but the children complain to their mothers that the teacher is mean and then the mothers complain to administration and there is a cycle so it is almost like we can't win.  My faculty head is also looking for us to exhibit an equal amount of positive reinforcement as negative reinforcement so it is a balancing act.  My issue is out of fear of being reprimanded or brought under a spot light by administration or even worse ADEC themselves I set out at the beginning of the year to only have a positive reward system.  Which on some levels has worked for me and has been motivating and the mothers love it.  But back to the problem at hand, I simply do not have enough time on task with my girls.  So the new year brings a new behavior management system.

I am implementing the stoplight system.  I have a hanging pocket chart with colored circles red, orange, yellow and green.  Each Sunday (like Monday) the girls start at green.  When they move to yellow it is a warning, orange final warning, and red means move away from the group and work alone.  Now of course girls can earn their way back up to green.  This system also has rewards, if you are in the green at the end of class you leave two minutes early (could never do this in the states it is fantastic!) which means the rest of the class thinks they are leaving late (although we would be in serious trouble if we let any of the girls out late).  They are in pure torture sitting waiting for just two minutes and it is really working!  Then on Thursday (Friday here) I am giving all the girls left in the green a small prize candy, gum, pencil etc.  I know I just started it but really I think it is working out quite well! I only had a few tears (tears must work on mom every time with some of these girls) and hopefully I won't have any angry mothers.

Now as far as helping my son transition into being a "big boy" I am at my wits end!  I am hearing from many that "my son was potty trained before two," or "before two and a half," and I am really starting to get a complex so here we go.  I let him run around all day no diaper and I sit him on the potty every 20 minutes and after naps and after waking in the morning and after a drink and after a meal and he refuses to go in the potty!  He exhibits all the signs he hates wet diapers and tells me he needs a new diaper all the time.  He loves his potty, loves to sit on it, but refuses to pee in it.  He pees on the floor in the same spot and so we put his potty in the same spot and yet he pees on the floor next to it.  I guess eventually he will go in the potty but at this point I just think he is stubborn.  I mean take this morning after waking up his diaper was dry and I have him a sippy.  I put him on that potty 10 to 15 times and sat with him.   We sang the little potty song I made up and we sat and sat.  Then after two hours (that means bladder control doesn't it?) he pees on the floor by the potty.  I think he just wants to be defiant and stubborn...I know my loyal fans and readers (lol my mom) will tell me he is only two....I digress...

In general news we are trying to buy a car and get a loan because car rental prices are just too high and at least when leave the country we can sell the car and maybe pocket a little extra cash but getting a loan has been a nightmare as everything in this country has been.  I think, I believe, I hope that as they say "Insha Allah" it will happen tomorrow.  We were thinking of going with a brand new Mitsubishi ASX but now we are toying with the idea of going to Dubai and checking out the used car lots as they have a lot of cars that are still under warranty and less than a year old for around 5000 USD cheaper.  There have been over 100 teachers that have left their cars at the airport or apartment parking lots and left the country blowing off their car loans and debt.  Apparently their situations were bad enough to warrant such poor purchasing decisions and abandoning debt to become wanted fugitives in a country they can never step foot in again...I am truly amazed at the behavior of some so called educated professionals; they have no idea how bad they make the rest of us look; which is one of the reasons I am struggling so much with getting my own car. 

Last weekend I went out with some other teachers to one of the night clubs in the hotels here in Al Ain and I had a great time dancing to top 20 American dance hits while drinking Vodka and cranberry juice (I made sure I dance for 20 minutes straight for each drink I had to burn the calories).  It was so much fun and I even stayed out until 3am.  I was under the weather the whole next day and realized that a night out at 33 is much harder than it was at 23 but still a lot of fun. Quite the scene even here in Al Ain down to the flamboyant Filipino man in make-up and heels busting a move on the dance floor.  Needless to say I will probably keep my drinking and dancing at a minimum as I can't afford to lose a whole day off to a hang over!

Well Michael and Gavin and I have begun a tradition of going of the mall on Fridays when all the Muslims are at church so we can have it to ourselves and the other expats.  Gavin gets to play at the play area and we window shop so I am off to do that now!  I think we may go see a movie tonight as well...

Holiday, Birthdays, and Sugar Highs!

The end of the trimester means assessment, grades, and a nice break is coming.  In contrast to the US school was over early every day through the week, little to know teaching or learning was really happening, and the last two days of the week almost none of my girls were coming.  We made some festive ornaments to decorate their rooms (they certainly had nothing to do with Christmas in this Muslim country!),

We have two glorious weeks off and by some miracle these two weeks happen to encompass Christmas and New Years for us westerners; my family couldn't be more happy to continue some form of tradition together this holiday season.  We have our Christmas tree up, a stocking for Gavin, and even a wreath to decorate our front door.  As per usual I am running around doing last minute Christmas shopping and procrastinating on getting all the wrapping done, although there is no rush as Gavin will simply tear them apart if I place them under the tree!  His favorite past time when mom and dad are involved and not paying attention is to toss all the ornaments around the house.

To get the holidays going my friend Abby held a cookie exchange and I have to admit that I was apprehensive and even felt a little like I was  a poser but low and behold I got my mom's snickerdoodle recipe and sat down to make them.  After driving all over the city I finally found all the ingredients minus the crisco which simply had to be supplemented by something called Ghee (pretty much the same but easier to stir and I am sure it is not quite the same).  Anyways by some miracle it turns out I can actually bake!

I was so proud of myself because I consider myself a flop and failure in the kitchen but as my friend Heather put it, "baking is an exact science, follow the recipe and you can't mess it up, cooking is more like an art; you just feel the ingredients and work and work until you create a masterpiece."  So my theory is I am a scientist in the kitchen and as long is there is a recipe I can follow it but I cannot simply taste a dish and recreate it like many artists I know!  So I took my plate full of cookies to my friend Abby's home and had a really great time!  It was wonderful chatting with other teachers and mothers and sharing our joys and frustrations with this change in our lives.  I had a lot of fun and look forward to more get togethers with these ladies.  The best part is I came home with a plate full of different decadent yummies that Michael and I had no trouble devouring over the weekend!

My husband and I have really gone overboard with the toys this year for Gavin for Christmas, but with the nephews so far away we can't spoil them as much.  Gavin has a nice toy workbench, toy kitchen, some puzzles, books, and clothing to look forward to.  On Christmas eve all the teachers and families that haven't left on holiday travels are planning to get together to eat at Chinese restaurant that rumor has is pretty fantastic so I am looking forward to some good Chinese food!  We are all bringing one small Christmas present for our children and one of the husbands is dressing up as Santa Clause and delivering the presents to the children.  We are hoping Gavin doesn't run away like he did from his last Santa encounter at the Hilton! 

We went to the annual lighting at the Christmas tree at the Hilton and it was quite the production with carolers singing all the must-hear-Christmas-songs, the lighting of the tree, complimentary wines and soft drinks, and then Santa of course repelling from the sixth floor balcony on a rope with drum rolls and spot lights, very exciting entrance.  Then we waited in line to see Santa and Gavin got his present and ran away after multiple attempts there was no picture for us to post on Facebook or the blog  of Gavin sitting like a good boy on Santa's lap.

My birthday was on Monday and I was so happy to see so many birthday wishes from family and friends new and old from all over the globe.  It really made me smile, social networking really helps to feel warm fuzzies on our birthdays doesn't it? I spent the morning and afternoon with three ladies getting pedicures, having a wonderful meal of Indian food and doing some light shopping at my favorite local mall, Bawadhi Mall.

For my birthday Mike, Gavin, and I took a trip about 70 miles to Dubai where we stayed in the Holiday Inn Express and I have to say after staying in a 5 stars hotel a 3 stars hotel simply is a place to sleep lol.  We went to the Dubai mall which is absolutely enormous and gorgeous and extravagant to say the least.  We had our first sushi in 6 months!  Gavin sat nicely believe it or not and snacked on fruit and a fresh fruit mango nectar, he loves the fresh juices in this country!  The sushi place had conveyor belts going around with color coded bowls filled with sushi.  You just grab what interests you and eat it, at the end they tally up how many bowls you have and give you your bill.  Michael and I proudly ingested around 264 dirhams worth of delicious sushi!  Or around 73 US dollars.  It was fantastic!  Then we strolled around the mall taking in the beauty of extravagant fountains, the tunnel of fish, and the enormous book store!

I will continue to risk my life driving to Dubai just to have monthly trips to the biggest most wonderful and a bit overpriced bookstore ever!  It is called Book World for good reason because it is a world of books!  The whole store s-curves into a huge circle of books galore!  They have every book that I could think of (although if you ask Michael their Sci Fi and Fantasy sections leave something to be desired).  Michael was really excited about the large selection of anime mangas and Naruto calendars (including other anime characters). They even have a huge geek display area in the back that would get any sci fi or comic book nerd oober excited.  Enormous lit up museum like displays of action figures. It couldn't help but make me laugh when Michael told me one day he aspires to have such a collection in his man cave...gotta love the nerd in him lol. 

We finished the evening at Cinnabon where we shared a mini cinnabon that wasn't really so mini, a piece of carrot cake, and oreo cake.  We also had a nice strawberry and banana shake that I thought was a smoothie when I ordered it!  Needless to say Gavin had more sugar in that one sitting than he has probably ever had at once and immediately became drunk by it.  He was being super chatty and silly making Michael and I laugh so hard, who needs entertainment when you can simply give a two year old sugar and watch him perform! 

As we were leaving the Dubai mall there is a section called Fashion row or something like that and it is a string of all the major designers that are referenced on Sex and the City, luxurious carpets line the floor that you sort of sink into!  I had to take my shoes off to squish the carpet in my toes.  As you are walking there is a runway in the middle that is a lit up floor and Gavin loved it!  He was running back and forth just cracking up loving it!  Unfortunately we had to pull him away kicking a little but due to his sugar overload his attention was easily averted to some pretty butterflies hanging from the ceiling lol.  After our fun filled trip to the Dubai mall we headed to our slumming three star accommodations (hopefully you understand the sarcasm here as the hotel was really nice and right in the category of where we usually stay in the US on vacations). 

Gavin, needless to say, had some trouble coming down from his sugar high and was literally bouncing around the room until some time after 12.  The next morning we barely made it to the breakfast that left something to be desired after what we were used to at Hilton.  It was the bare minimum with cereal, apples, a few danishes, juice, coffee, and milk, but it was nice!  Our plan was to go to the Dubai Outlet mall, check out the Dolphinarium, and then end our day with a dinner cruise.  But after the Outlet mall we were exhausted from our sugar-hungover-whiny-two-year-old-bundle-of-joy, not to mention we were located about 10 miles closer to Al Ain, it just seemed too easy to hop on the Dubai Al Ain road and be on our way home, and so we did!  We have decided our next trip to Dubai needs to be with out Gavin!